Flip flops and Ramen

Jericho (CBS)

People went nuts to get you back on the air, apparently they weren’t nuts enough to watch. The series finally aired this Tuesday.. the real question on everyone’s minds is not what’s going to happen to the citizens of Jericho but what the hell is Skeet Ulrich going to do now that he’s unemployed?

P E A C E the spork out!

Lost (ABC)           

Meet Kevin Johnson… let’s not. I’m still mad at Michael it’s was totally okay for his to shoot Anna Loco but to kill “I’m going to haunt you forever  carrying towels” Libby…that was uncalled for … THEN..T H E N…to tell your kid what you did like its going to make it better, you ruined to poor lad, now he doesn’t even want to acknowledge you existence… nice going Mike.I’m not even going to talk about how he and Walt got off the island; they had no money, no passports… NOTHING (PLOT HOLE)

Someone needs to install a kick ass on command feature on Sayid. Cause anyone need a good swift one in the ass it would be Michael/ Kevin/ Deckhand # 2 whoever you are calling yourself today. *le sigh*

High School Reunion (TV Land)

I love how they promote this show as brand new… please I was watching the show a few years back when it was on the WB. It’s the same tired theme song, and the same stank house in Hawaii. TV Land got that show for a bargain. So this year they have the graduating class on 1987 from J. J. Pierce High School from Richardson, TX. Something about those Texas high schools are filled with DRAMA!

This show is The Real World for those in your 30’s & 40’s… it’s sad (and I can say that considering I’m now in my 30’s)Okay so first on the crazy train we got Lana and Mike who were married after high school, but they divorced 13 years later after Lana had an affair with one of Mike’s friends, Steve. Lana said in the first episode she came to the reunion to make peace with Mike…Steve wasn’t introduced into the house until the 3^rd episode… all hell broke loose.

Then we have Kat who is the lesbian, she comes on the show after being in a relation for 15 years or so decides that, “she wants to try men again”. Naturally the men of the house fall over themselves to see how can bring the lezbot back from the “darkside”This is trash TV and I love it, buy t at the same time it’s sad these people are still trying to validate their lives by the labels that had in high school…but where ever drama is happening I’m there.

Next episode more fighting from the divorced couple, the shiznit will hit the fan when Mike  finds out that Lana is getting married…then Mike’s girlfriend then one he said “got away” comes into the house.

New Amsterdam (FOX): 

Catchy title, somewhat catchy premise. John Amsterdam and homicide detective working for the NYPD (New York used to be called New Amsterdam…see what I mean by catchy title). When John was a Dutch soldier in the 1600’s when he Native American girl during a massacre. In return the girl put an ancient spell that conferred immortality upon him. It was also prophesied that he would not age until he finds his one true love, and only then will he become whole and ready for mortality. Now here’s the really pimp part of the main character he’s fathered 63 children and he loves dogs (he won’t name them, he gives them numbers instead he’s currently on 36) and women; he’s been married a “few times” but had 609 girlfriends including a relationship with Emily Dickinson… all while waiting for his “true love”.

 The most excellent part of the story is that his sidekick Omar who’s like 63, is actually his son…he’s also employed his other children back when John was a lawyer his daughter was his secretary So hearing about this show I’ve already been predestined NOT to like it. How many shows have I got hooked on with “The immortal with a soul, fighting justice, righting the wrongs of society”.

So hearing about this show I’ve already been predestined NOT to like it. How many shows have I got hooked on with “The immortal with a soul, fighting justice, righting the wrongs of society” The problem with this show is it’s on FOX, so if you want to get into it I would suggest that you do it now, because I doubt it will be on air longer than one season., so far there are only 7 episodes, so maybe we can call this a mini-series.

One Tree Hill (CW)

Once upon a time there was a time when I loved Lucas Scott and I rooted for him because he was the underdog… now he’s just a dog. He proposed to Lindsey because he didn’t want to admit his true feeling  about Payton, and Lindsey is so delusional she goes along with it.  The she makes this big ole spectacle “I can’t marry you; I’m not your comet” HELLO… Payton has been telling you that since you brought your scrawny ass to Tree Hill. I’m happy she’s gone she cried way too much,  if she really wanted Lucas she should have bagged the whole “let’s be BFF’s” and been more like, “I’m with Lucas now, you’re his past, and if you try to get with him, I will cut yo ass (I realize that was really ghetto… but sometimes you gotta go that route to make your point clear).

For the longest time I would get made when people called Haley tutor whore…but she pissed me of TUTOR WHORE…  TUTOR WHORE. She’s ALWAYS complaining about who Nathan doesn’t do this Nathan do that, when they truth is Nathan has been with Haley since the beginning, even apologizing for stuff she made up in her “tutor” mind. So when she confront Nathan about psycho nanny he says, “I didn’t do anything” instead of being calm and rational she’s blows her tutor gasket and says, “I want you out of the house, I want a divorce.” But then you have to remember that’s she’s ALWAYS punking out of relationships, she left Nathan to go on the road with Chris “I’m a little creepy” Keller, even after he went after her… Haley is officially on my TV shit list.

Skillz… I will always stand up for the black man, but tailgating a wedding is wrong… you can only do that type of stuff in Wisconsin (we love to tailgate anything)

How awkward is it for your current and your ex are friends and neither knows about the others relationship. I wonder if the ex told his friend that Brooke took his virginity in the back of his car while a Peter Gabriel song played in the background (WAIT.. my bad; wrong movie..oopies)

But Bravo to Miss Brooke, who finally grew then balls she lost sometime after high school and fired her mother…uhm Victoria. The simple dismissal, “You’re fired, you can leave now” made me start singing “The Bitch is Back”, but later she tells Payton that she wants to have a baby…. And that shut me up real quick.

Bevin makes an apperance (I was hoping that she and Skillz were still together), she’s married to Tim and they have a son (Two of the dumbest people in Tree Hill got together and spawned)

Psycho Nanny Carrie is back! (Frankly is Haley was a real woman Carrie wouldn’t have been able to come back, I would have broken both her arms and a leg I’m being ghetto again. She needs at least one leg to scoot around in her wheel chair) With the evil plan to kidnap the very cute and huggable Jaime… but Evil Grandpa Dan is near, and does the dirty work for me, and saves the day at the same time. Now if I can figure out exactly what he wants from the OTH gang all would be write with the world.

Big Brother 9 (CBS)

I had to leave this last, cause I didn’t want to be in a sour mood until the end … first let me give you a rundown of who’s left in the house. I don’t know where they found these people,  one is less redeeming than the next.

Mr. Gay for Pay (James) - Since it’s a given that TTB is leaving he’s been telling her that he loves her… awww *gag* and just because she’s leaving James and TTB had sex again I say again because both of them talked about the first time they had sex when James on the block. I don’t know what it is about him… could be the pastel jeans that he wears or the fact that he has inappropriate tattoos and pink , but he looks like he smells. Plus he randomly like to sniff TTB’s twat…it’s all so odd and gross.

Trailer Trash Barbie (Chelsia) – She has the flattest ass I have ever seen and she’s constantly showing it on the live feeds. Then she says the dumbest thing in the world, “I wasn’t here to get the money” you sure as hell weren’t trying to get an acting gig… well not after your stripped and let all the boys penetrate you with their digits (I was trying to say that in the least offensive way), but who ever said she had class she’s TTB!

Bible totting, BJ giving, Bikini Barista (Natalie) – She actually thinks that God is going to avenge Matt’s eviction (I think God has bigger fish to fry). This is also the girl introduced herself as I’ve from the Beaver state… We received another spelling lesson from Natalie on how to spell ‘done’ tonight (D-U-N)

I’m a single mom! (Shelia) – This week the house guest think that Shelia is Matt’s mom, but  if Sheila were truly Mattie’s mom…..don’t ya think she would have “tipped her hand” just a wee bit sooner because of a weird BBBB stalking him? She is JUST NOW SHOWING a mother’s concern because HG’s are dissing his “eye” (he’s got that Paris Hilton wonky eye thing going on).Plus someone trying to say that Alex was her son a couple of weeks back? Hell, if you really want a quirky theory…look at her face and Rybreads straight on …NOW THERE IS A RESEMBLANCE

Cludumbo (Adam) – A true multi-tasker you can often find him in a bedroom reading the bible, occasionally scratching “down there.” And to think this man is Head of Household this week.

Better than Rehab (Joshuh) – loves to have little heart-to-hearts with himself and God. He said lots of great things that included, but were not limited to: Natalie’s vagina, how stupid everybody was in the house, in the past his “prayers” have included better abs, and help with his no carb diet. But hey if you ever need to know where to buy the “good shit” in Mexico he’s your guy. .. I’m sure if family is so proud

Rybread (Ryan) – His Pepaw died this week I’ll leave him alone…plus I really like Ryan when he’s not with the c*** of a girlfriend.

Furr friendly (Sharon) – She has the weird relationship with the guinea pigs and she’s driving the other house guests crazy… I should have called her Blandie, there’s nothing going there… she’ll go where the votes go.

Well that’s it for this week, until next time.

Live, Love, Laugh (just not at me)